To twerk, or not to twerk

To twerk, or not to twerk – that is the question. You’ve seen her limp tongue hanging from those crimson glossed lips and the image of her dry humping a foam finger in latex lingerie is probably burned into your skull. She took us all by surprise and has left us wondering how you can reveal so much of yourself in such a short amount of time.

My heart goes out to that steaming hot mess. I vividly remember singing “Best of Both Worlds” into my glittery pink hairbrush as I ran around in the morning getting ready for school. I was even that girl who bought the Hannah Montana wig for Halloween. I’ve locked those memories within the naïve bliss of childhood and I think it’s safe to say that old Miley has taken a permanent vacation. Her photoshoot with Terry Richardson certainly affirmed this notion.

The explicit photos with famous celeb photographer, Terry Richardson, feature Miley sucking everything from ice cream cones to mirrors, fingers to Arizona Iced Tea cans. Clearly this girl missed the life lesson we all learned from the classic PSA “Don’t You Put it in Your Mouth.” You may be pondering the question, “What pose would truly accentuate sucking inanimate objects?” Well folks, I’m pleased to tell you that a self-inflicted camel-toe goes with a sucked finger like peanut butter goes with jelly. The explicit photos show Miley pulling the bottom of her red bodysuit just enough to gracefully outline her prized lady parts. Don’t forget that this fashion season, nipples are the new black! The photoshoot reached its climax as her nipples made their print debut exposed beneath a tight white blouse.

Last time I checked, the ability to give yourself a camel-toe didn’t make the list of cool party tricks.

All I’m implying is that I’ve never turned on the news to see a gruesome story about how a bra ruthlessly murdered its wearer. Maybe she gets a different news stream than us. However, breaking free from a past where she was framed as America’s sweetheart must entail an unimaginable crisis of identity and self-image. I just think it’s a fair request that while doing it, she wear clothes.

When it comes to artists like Lady Gaga, who has also been criticized for naked photos and provocative performances, she has one quality Miley forgot about: balance. Gaga may have sported the occasional nipple sticker, but in interviews she is composed and professional while shrouding her personal life with a mysterious veil.

Miley hasn’t shied away from making sarcastic remarks about alleged drug use or partying; there is no side to her we haven’t seen. Intentionally or unintentionally, she has made herself into a classless sex symbol; there is little we don’t know about her. She’s revealed all of herself, which perhaps provides insight into society’s infatuation with her.  At the end of the day at least she has proved her point: she’s not who she used to be.


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